Friday, January 5, 2018

Melvin and Me, Part 3: Winter with Melvin

Now that we've gotten through the holidays, winter seems to have officially settled in.  Where Andy and I are, we had our first real snow on the 24th and the 26th was our first day of real cold, flirting around zero degrees (negative eighteen, for you Celsius folks) without the windchill.  It means that Andy and I try to leave earlier for our adventures, leaving time to properly bundle and allow grace for any difficult driving, though more frequently it's difficult drivers that require this grace.  I have happily been pulling out my favorite sweaters in my day-to-day wardrobe again.  

Andy and I tend to have two differing philosophies to cold--Andy's initial response is "it's not cold" though he does ultimately enjoy bundling up in certain clothing pieces and I don't even mess with it, ready with a scarf, hat, something more or less immediately.  As an illustration, I'm the one on the right side from this comic.  

Yes, winter is decidedly here.  And this being my first winter with Melvin, I have made some observations.  

There is something freeing about wearing bulky clothing--Melvin is a lot less noticeable, whether he is full or not, within the context of a super comfy sweater.  I am incredibly discreet as long as I dress "normally" for this time of year, and it is very nice not to have to consider that aspect when choosing my clothes.  The Stealth Belt itself actually does add just that little bit of extra warmth on my core.  However, I do still have to be careful that some winter wear isn't sitting directly on Melvin, specifically snowpants in my thought process.  After a shower, too, any remaining wetness from the appliance tends to stay wetter longer as there is less air circulation under my warm layers in the same way, adding some humidity which gets uncomfortable.   

Remember that feeling when you've just bundled up, layers upon layers with your mittens finally covered correctly by your coat, and you realize you have to go to the bathroom?  Now let's imagine that your clothing is not specifically designed to be removed at that convenient location, untucking all of the layers instead of just dropping ones pants.  Sometimes, I'm wrestling a few layers just to give Melvin a quick check, particularly if it's the first BM in a new bag.  AND when performing this emptying, these layers have to then not fall into the path of the now opened colostomy bag.  Normally, I tend to wear a cami specifically to help fold up my other clothing to keep it out of the way, but that gets trickier when we add in these heavy layers.  Think about every time you've trailed long sleeves through dinner reaching for a roll or how a scarf or a tie manages to flop in just the wrong direction at an inopportune moment.  I'll add another obstacle to the scenario, public restroom in the mall, with one's winter coat, purse, all shopping bags while still trying to wrestle everything out of the way while still managing to unload the bag.  I have tried pinning some pieces to the wall with my shoulder, tucking some weight under my armpit and some over my shoulder while still trying to empty the bag in the toilet (as opposed to on the seat or floor) and without any backsplash--it's a balancing act, to say the least.  

Another issue:  I definitely get dry skin in the winter, upping lotion to body cream to get some additional moisture.  Whelp, I cannot really treat that part of my body for dry skin.  If I put something on my skin, it decreases the ability of the flange to stick to my body.  And potentially not treating the skin could cause it to break down more readily and become unsticky because of weeping, angry skin.  Thankfully, that's hasn't been too much of a problem yet, but I am very conscious about treating my skin as nicely as possible around the bag site and preventing any leaks that I can.  

And for a silly kind of problem, between the Stealth Belt and the fabric backing of the bag, there is a bit of static that can build up now when I'm taking either or both off, there is that familiar crackle, particularly with a fresh or empty bag that sticks to my sides in just that right way to be annoying.  

There was a very odd moment the other day, something that stuck out to me as one of those "Life with Melvin" moments I never could have predicted.   Apart from the branch manager, I am the only one in the office that has a window.  It is a floor to ceiling window, a good eight feet or so across.  It offers me a great view of the gas station, but, hey, it's a window.  People come by to take a look outside and sometimes say hello, which can be wonderful or frustrating, depending on what kind of a project I'm on.  Recently, I've taken great delight in walking down to Andy's desk and letting him know whenever it is snowing.  Now, the downside to this window is that it can get quite cold in my little corner.  This last week it was VERY cold in my little corner.  At the time, though, I wasn't quite cold enough to grab my coat, but I had resolved to layer a little bit better so that I might be able to feel my fingers and toes.  And then without warning, there goes Melvin, burbling away into the bag with a healthy blurp of fresh (enclosed) stool.  Then, my next thought was "Ahhhhhhh" as my body registered the warmth against my body where the bag was, that part of my abdomen felt nice and toasty.  And then I mentally stopped in my tracks and  had a good laugh, understanding that I was, in fact, grateful in that moment for the warm bag of poop strapped to my side. 

My what a weird world this is.  But, there are still comfy sweaters and less pain than before.  So far, I'll chalk it up as weird but a win.

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